Rope and Safety.... Never Assume

by Tatu
May 2005


Rope is not safe. Huh? What did he say?  You heard right, rope is not safe. There are numerous things that can go wrong with Rope and Rope Bondage.  People can and have been hurt by taking their activities to a level of risk beyond their knowledge and ability.  I would venture to say some have perhaps even been killed.

I'm not saying you should not do rope. Just first understand the risks. Nothing in life of significance or pleasurable has ever been accomplished or experienced unless risk is assumed and taken.  It is like the idea of "safe sex". Terminology in use in the 1980's and early 90's until it dawned on someone that with all the communicable diseases out there and the fact that no method is 100% effective.  It seems people were getting the idea from the phrase "safe sex", that if they used condoms they could not get pregnant or a STD,  Wrong.  So the critical thinkers came up with the phrase, "Safer Sex", so as to make people think before they assume. 

So before we begin. Before you pick up a piece of rope or let someone put it on you, you must first take into account the risks and be willing to set aside ego and purpose to learn.

You need to understand that you can seriously hurt or even kill someone by letting your ego get in the way of learning and applying that knowledge in a responsible manner.

"Never Assume".   One great principle I have learned over time in life to apply here is to "never assume" while working with rope.

1)  Never assume the rope will hold just because it looks like it will.

2)  Never assume the hardware is rated sufficiently for your use.  Check it out.

3)  Never assume your bottom is physically healthy and able to do what you want to do.  Ask question. Be specific. Think about overall health, and specifics like joints, past surgeries, current pains.  While in the initial scenes ask how she is feeling, if anything needs to be adjusted.

4)  Never assume your bottom is mentally healthy. Past abusive experiences can surface while in bondage and suddenly turn your erotic scene in to something ugly for you lovely. You may need to talk through some of these issues and not do certain things.  Again while in those first scenes, ask her what she is feeling and if her head space is good.

5) Never assume your bottom is sober. I have made the mistake in the past fo tying persons who may have had a drink or two. The complications here are numerous. As a personal choice I will no longer do that.  I once tied up someone who I knew was a non-drinker, but it was her birthday and one of her girlfriends bought her a couple of drinks and before I knew it, she was getting dizzing and dangerously close to passing out on me.  So never assume, ask.

6)  Never assume that hard point is hard and will not give way when suspension weight is applied.  Here I would say, NEVER suspend or allow significant weight to be applied by someone on an eyelet screwed into a ceiling. Always make sure your hard points are hard and the hardware rated to take the weight.

7)  Never assume rope is going to be enjoyed by everyone.  I personally hate it...  I allowed myself to be bound once by two female friends some years ago, and it was absolutely the worst experience of my alternative lifestyles life.  Some people cannot deal with the loss of control issue. Some crave it, others need to give it.

8)  Never assume someone has your best interest in mind.  Some will not be respectful of the power exchanged and will take advantage of the moment.  Make sure both parties are consensual about what is to happen. Talk it all out and respect each others boundaries.

 


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